A Love Letter

Dear Spunky

I love you.

We have been partners in love and life for a quarter of a century. We have many chapters of love, each with a new sense of depth. Every day is a new page in our love story. It may not be a thrilling page turner, but it’s definitely an epic story. There’s no grand plot twist, no undercurrent of unhappiness or bad luck. Just a simple dedication to loving.

Chapter 1 – Friends with benefits

I think the title of this chapter gives enough of a description. We began our love story as flat mates, instant friends as we swapped pleasantries over a really good cup of tea on the back steps in the sunshine. Maybe it was the quality of the tea making that first attracted me to you, or the fact that my mum said ‘He’s the type of man you could marry’ upon meeting you that kick started our love story? Then, well, I guess the Mills& Boon style lust took over. Who would have thought those heady uni days of secret rendezvous in your room would have led to such a substantial love story?!

Chapter 2 – The real deal

I remember the first time you told me you loved me. We were sitting on the front verandah in our share house at Towradgi, in the middle of a party. You were unequivocal in telling me of your love. I was less sure. It could have been the bottle of homemade Sambucca we had shared that was holding me back, but I clearly remember saying ‘I think I love you. I’ve never been in love, but it feels like what love should feel’. But I knew then, just as I know now. Our love was and is shared. It’s a bond that makes everything feel…possible.

You told me that you had always experienced love as a struggle until you met me. You said that with me love was easy. I was confused, as I couldn’t imagine love any other way. I had never seen it as a struggle, my parents loved each other deeply and it didn’t seem like something they had to work at, they just loved. So, I just loved you. It was easy because you made it easy to love you.

Chapter 3 – Pre-kid love adventures

Escaping reality to backpack around the world with you was like a choose-your-own adventure love story in itself. We laughed, cried, and loved our way around South East Asia, Nepal, India and Europe. The simple act of you grabbing my hand during tense encounters or negotiating bargain basement room rates for us imprinted more love into my heart on a daily basis. It seemed such a love induced decision to write another chapter in our romance novel by making a baby. For surely only love could persuade either of us to remove enough clothing to copulate while living in the sub-zero Parisian winter in a campervan.

Chapter 4 – The kid love daze

I clearly remember being so in love with you during the time that our kids were born and growing. Words and time seemed to blur. Maybe it was all those mummy hormones, but you made life sparkly beyond the tantrums and sleepless nights. While many friends’ marriages were feeling the pressure of family life, our love seemed to grow as the kids did.

Your dedication to being a dad is the tangible definition of love. If we could bottle it, we would make a fortune.

You had always been my partner, a quality that I loved so much about you. And now you were a true partner in parenting. There has never been a separation of roles in our home and while you are the unspoken designated bin taker-outerer and I’m the bathroom cleaner, we take on life as a shared responsibility. Again, love is shared.

I love how you invest your care and interest in the kids activities. The brutal blows you feel for them at times of injustice and the pride that beams from your every pore for their achievements.

When I asked the kids what they love most about you, they could fill a library had with kind words to describe you. But what they love most is your constant motivation to get things done and your unconditional support and encouragement to see your kids and wifey succeed. What better qualities could you model for teenagers?! You should be proud.

Chapter 5 – All the things to love

There are so many qualities I love about you. And to be honest, there are plenty that drive me nuts.

I love that I can always tell how you feel because you sing your emotions. I’m sure it’s subconscious, but you find song lyrics (usually from the 80s) to suit and start singing away.

You are the pun-iest person I know. I love your wit with words. You have an extraordinary ability to make fun of almost any situation. And while I don’t always laugh at your jokes, I love that you create them.

You are the least materialistic person I’ve ever met. I mean, you are truly on Buddha level enlightenment when it comes to possessions. With the exception of surfboards. They are like your children. They are treasured, maintained with true love and while you let them go free when you’ve ‘outgrown’ them, you never stop loving them. I love the things you find value in are the things that bring you enjoyment. I love how nifty you are with finding value and treasuring quality.

When you laugh so hard that you cry, it makes me laugh too. I love that you can elicit that.

The love you have for Jaws is so beautiful. He is our third child and even the kids recognise, he is your favourite child. I feel so lucky to see daily reminders of how you were with the kids as babies by the way you speak and play with Jaws.

Most of all, I feel so lucky to have you as my partner. My shared love.

You support me unconditionally. You encourage me constantly. You ‘deal’ with me so lovingly that I often forget how sensitive you are. I could fill volumes with the love I have for you.

Love you now and forever spunky, spunkarama, sexy bum, honeybuns…

Xk

Ps. Oh, and I love that you bring me coffee every morning.